I recently completing reading ‘The Secret Language of Leadership’ by Stephen Denning. It has considerable helpful information. Here are my takeaways that I want to share with you.
- People listen to body language first! The body language of calm assertiveness is relatively simple to learn: square shoulders, open body stance, feet firmly planted on the ground, and the right kind of eye contact. (Eye contact is the most important.) Without the calm assertiveness, the verbal language will have little, if any, effect.
- Negative stories typically stimulate the listener’s limbic (emotional); they don’t generate enthusiasm for a future course of action.
- Core presentation organization -> (1) Define Problem, (2) Analyze problem, (3) Recommend solution
- (1) Get their attention, (2) Elicit Desire, (3) Reinforce with Reason.
- (1) Negative stories get attention, (2) positive story to get action, (3) Neutral stories explain what, when, how and why.
- “The most important function of getting attention isn’t taking information in, but preparing the listener’s mind for something new.’
- Attention is attracted to what is unexpected. Ahhhh..pain is more urgent than pleasure.
- Stage 1: Generally Effective tools for Getting Attention – tell a story about the audience’s problems
, – tell a story of how you handled adversity, – ask a question, – launch an unexpected exercise, – issue a challenge, – share something of value, – admit a vulnerability - Generally Ineffective Ways of Getting Attention – Hype, – tell of story of who your company is, – just give the facts.
- Stage 2: Effective, – seeing is believing, – tell a positive story, – tell the story of who we are. Ineffective: – present arguments & reasons, tell ‘burning platform’ stories, create dissatisfaction to sell your point, – depict an actual image of the future, – tell fictional stories.
- “Of the three steps, the middle step – stimulating desire for change – is the most important.
- Communication is more emotional than logical
- “Overall, the factors most likely associated with getting attention in rank order, were: the message was personalized, it evoked an emotional response, it came from a trustworthy source or respected sender, and it was concise. The messages that evoked emotional and were personalized were more than twice as likely to be attended as to as the messages without these attributes.”
- “Some of the strongest stories are the smaller and the least pretentious. It’s precisely because they are small and unpretentious that they work. It’s a question of understanding the right form of story to elicit desire: generally, it’s a positive story about the past where the change, or an analogous change, has already happened, and it is told in a simple, minimalist manner.”
- “Stories tend to be more interesting, fresh, and entertaining than abstract argument. Stories fit the way people think and make decisions. Story weaves in emotion in a way that rational argument can never do. Story is flexible. For instance, imagine that….”
- Start where the audience is, not where you are. Understand the audience’s current situation – which is often a difficult task.
- “We know that human beings think in stories.They dream in stories. Their hopes and fears reside in stories. Their imagination consist of stories. They gossip, love and hate in stories. Their emotions have a narrative character. Storytelling is closely associated with the very conception of the self.”
- “It’s not the story itself that is striking, it’s the linkage of the stories to other things” to your purpose.
- Human goals matter, and the narratives encapsulate human goals. The pattern of words that we use matters: are they abstract, cold, impartial, objective, inert, seemingly remote from human goals? Or do they have all the richness and texture of human existence?
- The interaction among narratives matters, an interaction that is taking place in seconds: a single word, or phrase, or sequence, at the right time – or out of place- makes all the difference. The outcome is decided in a flash.
- One central aspect of the language of transformational leadership is therefore to articulate goals and activities in term than can be viewed by participants as worthwhile in themselves. Worthwhile goals enhance the possibility of sustained enthusiasm.
- Transformational leaders typically present their goals as larger than any particular task or organization or time-bound objective.
- People change their minds in three ways – by experience, by observation, and my symbolic learning.
- Tom Sadchle, a former US Senator said, ‘If you want to get elected, learn to speak. If you want to say elected, learn to listen.”
- To get the attention of the CEO’s, usually the momst promising approach is to focus on issues of interest to them now (audience-centeredness). CEO’s usually won’t buy the idea unless it becomes part of themselves. There is often no in-between – it’s either the CEO’s own idea or it’s not worth anything.’
- Throw away your notes.
- Style cannot be separated from substance.
- Make sure your gestures are congruent to your words.
- Use words & pictures. Research shows men prefer pictures and women prefer words.
Successful Business Communication 